Rhetorissa

Pleonasm

2008-01-09T12:10:00.000-07:00

Bwahahahahaha! Thank you much, Dinosaur Comics. :)

How to Write a Metaphor

2007-12-05T08:14:00.000-07:00

I like Wikihow, and this is a good article on how to write a metaphor. (It touches on similes, too.)

"Metaphors are the cold knife in your side. They are the speed bumps that keep you from picking up writing momentum. They are the hidden monster lurking in the closet of ... of ... oh, darn it. Metaphors are tough, no doubt about it. But approached methodically, metaphors can be the spice in the cuisine that is your written work..."

Their best tip? Practice! :)

Be quiet in the library!

2007-12-05T08:08:00.000-07:00

They mean it.
(from Savage Chickens)

That's what you get, buddy!

2007-11-21T08:06:00.000-07:00

Don't mess with the grammar sheriff!

(from explosm.net)

More fun than...

2007-11-21T07:41:00.000-07:00

The Savage Chickens artist (Doug Savage) must be a language geek, too.

Book Sites 2 - Brian Dettmer's Book Autopsies (Art)

2007-11-20T15:09:00.001-07:00

These are incredible: Brian Dettmer's amazing book autopsies.

I found them here (Well, really I found them there via Boing Boing.)

Book Sites 1 - Judged by the Cover

2007-11-20T14:51:00.000-07:00

Let's face it, we all do it. Go officially judge a book by its cover at coverboom.

After all, aren't we all sick of the standard covers? What are all those silhouttes doing out there anyway? ;)

Here's one of my favs:

"About face!" & the meaning of Rhetorissa

2007-11-14T19:10:00.000-07:00

Well, as the title of this posting implies, I'm doing an "about face" on this blog. I can't think of any reason to keep this going as a personal blog. My hubby & I will start writing a personal blog together soon.

When I started this blog, I thought up the name Rhetorissa. This is due to the fact that I live a life in words (i.e., rhetoric) in many ways. As much as I appreciate visual and musical arts, my life is truly defined in words. I edit & proofread for a living. I am highly literal, in that if you say something vague, I truly won't get it... I can't connect the dots, make the leap, whatever, because there may be more than one meaning and I have to be absolutely sure of the meaning. I'm not highly literal with poetry, though -- I love the infinite shades of meaning that might be present in a poem, and I try in my poems to ensure that more than one meaning exists.

Perhaps most importantly, I think of myself as a writer. I am trying to finish my many-begun short stories and am in the middle of writing a sci-fi novel (O noes!), which is actually really hard!

So, in an effort to focus myself more on writing & to make this blog have more content, I now re-focus on words. This will be a somewhat loose focus, as in anything even remotely having to do with the art of rhetoric might be posted here (like the funny below!). Nonetheless, I think it'll do me some good to think about writing more, and hopefully this blog may actually develop into something worthwhile!

Savage Chickens: Jabberwocky Cartoon

Chased

2007-10-16T10:18:00.000-06:00

I
Watched silently
As a shadow
dodged across the street
Chased by a chatter of leaves –

No one
Could know
but you.

All
Of the well-meaning
All

Turned,
Curled to
A fetal ball
And bared their fangs.
Chased by a scatter of dreams –

.

-issa

Grammar Humor

2007-10-15T15:48:00.000-06:00

I'm such a geek that I just LOVE grammar humor.

You too? Check this out: http://grammarlaughs.blogspot.com/

Updates

2007-10-05T09:15:00.000-06:00

*Sigh*

I haven't blogged in such a very, very long time. I always say I'm going to be better about it, then I'm not.

I do have the excuse that it's been quite a busy summer. Let's see... I stopped blogging right about the time that we went to Fruita, CO, for some great mountainbiking. If you mountainbike & haven't made it to Fruita, good! Stay away! MwaHahahahaha! >D

K & I also went to Buena Vista, CO, & biked part of the CO Trail... some of the parts of that trail had such an eerie beauty -- it would really send chills down your spine... And it was so isolated - we hardly saw anyone the entire 10 miles or so. This is just one of the many reasons I'd like to live near there someday. Alas, it's too far a commute to my job for now! I'll just have to try to get myself to the point of making a living writing so I can isolate myself from the world and only come to town for groceries or something. Probably by the time that happens, though, the place will be just as populated as Denver is now. >:(
There is truly no escape from the insane rise of human over-population.

Colorado Trail

I also finally made it to Rampart Range Reservoir for an approx 13 mile bike ride. That's a pretty tough trail, too, I think. I had to walk several parts of it, unfortunately. Some stuff I should have walked & didn't. I ended up with nice road rash, but it looked worse than it was thanks to all the dirt. As I informed a friend of ours, dirt helps the blood clot. I did make it all the way, and was really proud of myself. I then proceeded to do a much easier trail a few days later and utterly beat myself to a pulp, including hitting my freakin' head so hard I saw stars. I've barely been on the bike since... but I will be this weekend.

We also took a really hard hike from Horsethief Trail to Sentinel Point in Divide, CO. This is about a 3000 mile altitude increase in 4.5 miles of hiking. It was awesome, but man did I have a headache. I'm really glad we went with someone who really knew the hike, because I sure couldn't find the trail most of the time.
Waterfall at Treeline (Horsethief to Sentinel)
View of the other side from the summit (Horsethief to Sentinel)
K & I at the summit (Horsethief to Sentinel)

Just in the last week, I went to two concerts up in Denver, both on work nights. I must be somewhat masochistic, cuz OY. that. hurt.

The first concert was Billy Joe Shaver at the Soiled Dove (last Tuesday). The Soiled Dove is a neat little venue, IMHO. It reminded me of a dinner theater - small, with tables all facing the stage. This makes it pretty chill, but it's a bit tough to find space to shake your booty. Nonetheless, I liked it. You're so CLOSE to the performance :D Billy Joe did a fantastic job. K & I have adored him for a long time. If you don't know who he is, he's a rough old cowboy singer/songwriter (mostly songwriter) who wrote such classics as 'Honky Tonk Heroes' and 'Old Chunk of Coal'. He is so genuine in his performance. He really seems to feel every word, and that makes you feel it, too. I wanted to cry when he sang about his talented son that died of a drug overdose.

Billy Joe Shaver (from http://www.classactentertainment.com/)

We got to meet him after the show and shake his hand (which is missing parts). He was great to meet -- he informed me that I'm "too little to be in here" -- he was funny and genuine, and it's always great to meet a legend :) It's also great to have a signed shirt & book of his.

The other concert was Smashing Pumpkins at Red Rocks Ampitheater (Sunday). Billy Corrigan put together a great band, and they were really tight. They went out of their way to put on a good show, pulsing lights and all. I don't know if it's because I was so tired, if it was because I had just seen an incredible show the same week, or if it was something to do with SP's performance, but it just never floated from the 'great' sphere to the 'awesome' sphere. I've listened to the recording since then (I was impressed they allowed recording & small cameras), and again, it's really tight and good, but it's not something I'm dying to listen to... hmmm...

So, that's it: "What I Did on my Summer Vacation".

Contortionist Archery

2007-09-20T13:14:00.000-06:00

Whoa.

That's the coolest thing I've seen in a long time.

tn

2007-09-09T16:49:00.000-06:00

self portrait

2007-09-09T16:44:00.000-06:00

Damn right I can! Watch this!

2007-08-12T20:22:00.000-06:00

My wonderfully funny Uncle Stan :)

Edit: My sis took this video, not me.

Mural

2007-05-26T09:44:00.000-06:00

YOU PAINT YOUR PAIN ACROSS THE WALL –
HURRIEDLY TRYING –
GET RID OF IT ALL -
YOU CAN BE POLICED AGAIN –
GREAT WAVES OF BEATING, BLEEDING GREENS,
THROBBING YELLOWS,
ACRID-SOULED METALLICS THAT POUR
POUR
POUR –
ENDLESS? –
GRAB UP THE NEAREST BUCKET –
DELICIOUSLY LOUD CLATTER
AS YOU THROW IT WHOLE ON THE WALL –
BUT REACH FOR IT AND FALTER,
FILLED AGAIN,
AND THE NOT-DISTANT SIRENS –
o
HOW THEY WAIL AND CALL –
WAIL AND CALL –

For my sister.

Fruita, CO

2007-05-23T21:13:00.000-06:00

Strategy

2007-05-12T12:20:00.000-06:00

Carmen, Revised.

2007-05-02T17:50:00.000-06:00

The hushed quiet here is because of smothering.

Thick pile carpet swallows footsteps while the mantle clock ignores all comings and goings completely. tick... pause... whir... tick.... Looking around, even with child eyes, at everything painstakingly in place, you know there will be no laughing and no loud young voices tolerated.

What did she do here? A red-haired beauty foolishly marrying into this? Or wait, is that wrong? Was this her own stern family frowning down?

A hallway, an etagere with a figurine of two hands in prayer atop a doily -- probably both homemade. More framed faces here and there along the wall.

A bedroom, an elderly woman dressed in flowered flannel sitting primly on the bed, reading. The younger girl I am with – a blonde beauty wild like her mom – tries to make an introduction. There is silence after her words and my hello. Is she perhaps a little deaf? The child rushes up to the woman. Gramma, Gramma, I want you to meet my friend.

Is this all it takes to unmask such deep silence? Somehow the pin is pulled. The woman is up, advancing quickly toward me as I back up into the hallway; she waves her bible and yells.
“I-KNOW-WHO-YOU-ARE-”
I am trying to get Carmen to stay behind me, not understanding what is happening, but trying to protect her against it. She will not have this, slips between us, shouts back at her Gramma.

The older woman raves – and it is about me. About my mother. How my mother is trying to tear a marriage apart. Through the shouting, I understand this much only. A thick anger, but I can't overrule my silence in time --

Two people come to intervene -- my stepfather and Carmen's mother, who were talking quietly together in the kitchen... now more yelling.

She retreats. I am fine, but they are upset. Together they try to hug me and comfort me, but it is they who are crying, it is they who need comforting. I tell them, it's okay, but they cry and cry and insist it's not okay, not okay. I am bewildered by their guilt and smothering in their arms.

I look up and wish for this scene to quietly end.

tick... pause... whir... tick....

To be a good sport...

2007-04-29T09:03:00.000-06:00

OK, the one other blogger I 'know' on here (aside from my husband) tagged me for this, so I'm going to be a good sport & post my answers. I am not, however, going to tag anyone else, especially not 7 others, since I don't know 7 others & wouldn't typically do so anyway :P

I've been tagged to name 7 of my favorite songs and 7 strange habits I might have.

Let's do the habits.

1. I stretch out in the shower. This is because the shower warms my muscles up, but you also have water pouring over your face as try to 'downward dog,' which is inconvenient.
2. Not only do I talk to my plants, I kiss them.
3. I edit emails grammatically before I send them on to people I know. I also remove any 'you must forward this to a billion people or you'll turn into a toad' type text before it makes it to my outbox.
4. I argue with the radio. This is usually a daily occurrence & drives my husband crazy since he thinks I'm talking to him. Good thing I don't have a TV.
5. I have to follow a step by step order of operations to prepare for bed. It's not interesting.

I can't think of any more. 5 will have to do - sorry to ruin the parallel numbers.

Now I guess this is where I will write my 7 favorite songs:

1. Shame by PJ Harvey
2. Highwayman by Willie Nelson (et al) (totally cheesy, I totally know)
3. Rodeo Clowns by G-Love
4. Sober by Tool
5. The Remainder by Sleater Kinney
6. The Song that Never Ends by Lambchop ;) OK, not really.
7. Pancho & Lefty by Willie Nelson (et al)

I like a lot of music...

Easter

2007-04-08T13:52:00.000-06:00

What's better on Easter than getting an Easter basket? My sweet husband gave me one... something that hasn't happened in years & which brought me right to my 'happy place'!

:)

Chocolate buzz! Woo-hoo! Hehe.

Inspiration

2007-04-05T21:23:00.000-06:00

I know I haven't posted much here, but I have been writing, and that is going well. Not the sci-fi novel - instead a feisty old lady somewhere inside me demanded my attention.

She's awesome.

I love inspiration.

My dog needs drugs

2007-04-03T17:48:00.000-06:00

Yep, she does. Neurotic to the bone, this Irish Setter. She's always been needy and a bit strange (we got her from the pound, & this breed is highly emotional), but now she's slipped over the edge and is on the doggie equivalent of Prozac due to anxiety at home (she's fine at the dog park, of course).

My Maggie.

Dreams

2007-03-13T08:46:00.000-06:00

I love dreams. It is amazing what the subconscious can create when unbridled. I love my dreams so much that I would be the first to sign up for any technology that could record them so I could play them back in their full detail when I awoke (a la 'Ghost in the Machine').

Instead, even when I try to write them down immediately, I get only snippets of the full dream. Sometimes I get the whole plot line, but more often something like 'nuns, little girls, subterfuge' - hahahahha. Funny in its own right, but I want the whole thing. It seems like the more I practice writing them down immediately, the better I remember over time. I NEED to make myself do that more!

-issa.

Swagger and Fall

2007-03-06T18:30:00.000-07:00

I've swaggered myself.

too far.

many times.

arrogant arrogance,

but really bravado.

Yet as I lie,

embarrassed on my side,

I say that my fall

is the best of them all-

o arrogant arrogance

(but really bravado)

-issa.

Reflection

2007-02-26T17:18:00.000-07:00

New prose writing:

Reflection

It seems all wrong somehow.

I scan the wasteland before me. Burned out cars; bodies left in the positions of their final agonies; one other person still alive, but dazed, wandering through the rubble numbly, walking nowhere.

It isn't the death scene before me. That is right, a product of the time and place, fated.

Some acrid chemical pervades the air, so the deep breath I take in burns to my core. I sit down where I am; the debris around me hugs closer. I lean over, look into metal shards that used to be structural, and unanchored tears come. I try to think about it all – a plan from beginning to deadly end; a triumph for people who can't believe that the variety of this world might not be a conspiracy, a personal affront targeted to insult them. A siren calls distantly.

I rub the tears into the metal with my sleeve. Rusty shards of my reflection stare up at me, bright, startling, awash in perverted sunshine.

-issa.

In Memorium...

2007-02-12T17:33:00.000-07:00

Sadness sucks.

Rest in peace.
And, thanks.

Just in Case

2007-01-07T15:36:00.000-07:00

Just in case this is how you know that I love you, I will try to feed you more than you could ever eat; I'll put the paste on your toothbrush at night; ask if you're okay with the slightest sigh you make. I'll wash clothes separately since you're sensitive to dryer sheets – and the music you like will be what I play when we drive – all so just in case you wake up one day and wonder if my love is fake, you can tell yourself, no way. Only a true-felt love would undertake these tiny pains – would make sure my brush has toothpaste and pack my travel suitcase. Just in case. But what if this is not it -- not how you know this love is real but what actually gets under your skin and makes you feel itchy and ill? So for today, I won't – no cooking, no toothbrush, no questioning face... Just in case.

-issa.

Ruminations re: family/friends

2006-10-19T11:56:00.000-06:00

Looking through a bunch of pictures today, I experienced a number of emotions I commonly feel in regard to my family & friends. Though I seem to feel these every time I encounter them, I never really investigate the feelings. So... for myself, I'm going to. I'll blog about one person every week or so... starting, of course, with my husband.

The picture to the right is how I often see him. He is a trail warrior, called that by me because I've seen him "attack the hill" so many times, so intensely. I am usually a mile or so behind, huffing & puffing. This, mind you, is whether we are hiking or biking. His cardio equals Superman's.

Superman. I joke that he is Superman all the time, prompted by this adorable pic of him about 5 years old in his costume. The family tale of that pic has it that they had to buy about 5 of those costumes before Halloween that year, because he kept wearing them out. You can tell... you can really tell that he BELIEVES he is Superman. The look in his eye means business. He has committed.

This trait in him still manifests itself. This makes him intense, a bit crazy, and a lot bossy (my own bossiness exceeded only by his and my mother's...) Sometimes these things get old. But he is also sweet, smart, and fun.

My favorite thing about my husband, though, is his commitment to right action. This is a Buddhist term, but we didn't know it when we decided we have to live that way. Though he travels a lot on business, though he hangs out with some guys who are all into their machismo, I know I can trust him. Always. That's not something everyone has... I'm starting to think it is, in fact, the rarest of traits. I've watched my poor mother go through divorce after divorce, and all I can think is how lucky I am to have found this one first.

Joys of Commitment

2006-10-17T08:10:00.000-06:00

It is hard for me to blog because I hate commitment. It makes me nervous because I always think I might change my mind later & then contradict myself, or people may easily misinterpret what I said in the first place. But I've learned lately that commitment really has its benefits, too, thanks to being married for 2 years now. So... we'll give it a shot!